HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

COMING 2011

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!!!

STAY SAFE!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

MALIGAYANG PASKO SA INYONG LAHAT!!!

"NAKAHANDA NA AKO SA PAGBABALIK KO! KAYO HANDA NA BA KAYO PARA SA AKIN?" - JUAN PABLO

"SATURNINO'S FLAMING FINGERING TECHNIQUE LEVEL 2!!! READY NA DIN BA KAYO?" - BENJOE

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE!!!

NEYBOR AND SALAMANGKA EBOOKS ARE STILL FOR SALE!!!

Tula ng Pag Asa

Tula ng Pag Asa

by Jonathan Paul Diaz

Dalawang tuhod nakabaon na sa lupa

Bakas ng pagkatalo sa noo moy nakapirma

Matay pikit at mga kamaoy sarado

Lawa ng dugo ang buong katawan mo

Kay dami mo nang pinagdaanang paghihirap

Para makamtan ang kalayaang pinapangarap

Kay dami nang kaaway na iyong napatumba

Sasali ka ba sa kampo nila?

Bangon kaibigan at buksan mo iyong mata

Bukang liwayway handog ay bagong umaga

Mga kamao buksan at linisin ang sarili

Panatiliing nakabaon, di ka magwawagi

Sa bawat dapa may bago kang karanasan

Di na pauulit sa susunod na laban

Sa bawat sugat mga ala alang kay pait

Kinabukasang malaya siya namang kapalit

(Another poem i found in my old hard drive, dated 2005)

Tula ng Pag Ibig

Tula ng Pag Ibig

by Jonathan Paul Diaz

Akoy iyong inantig sa isang ngiti

kislap ng mata moy pampunaw ng dalamhati

Nang iyong binigkas aking pangalan

tila mga anghel sa langit bilang nagkantahan

Diyosa ng buhay ko, bakit ako?

kay daming makisig, matipuno, at gwapo

Simpleng tao lang ako, ngunit pusoy tunay

Habang buhay handang maging karamay

Tanging maihahandog ko wagas na pag ibig

Sa panahon ng tag tuyot ako ang iyong tubig

Sa landas na panahon ay magiging malupit

Akoy nandon yakap ka ng mahigpit

Sa pagtulog mo sa tabi mo akoy magbabantay

Saka na iiglip sa bukang liwayway

Babantayan kita sa abot ng makakaya

Ikaw ay hiyas na regalo ni Bathala

Di hahayaan luha tumulo sa iyong pisngi

Bago mahulog sigurado itoy napunas na ng aking daliri

Habang buhay pipilitin ko mapanatili ang iyong ngiti

Makakaasa kang pag ibig na tunay para sa iyo binibini

(funny i just found this poem i made 5 years ago in my old hard drive)

MPex Sneak Peak

MPex

Jonathan Paul Diaz

Chapter 21: SIGA v2.0

Unang araw ng pasukan ng bagong taon may tumigil na jeep sa likod ng unibersidad. Bumaba ng jeep si Juan Pablo ngunit inalalayan bumaba si Monique. Naglakad ang dalawa patungo sa gate, magkahawak ang kamay kaya ang matandang security guard ang laki ng ngiti sa mukha.

“Happy New Year Manong!” bati ni Jayps. “Happy New Year din sa inyo” sagot ng matanda at kumikindat pa. “Manong di ko alam kung masaya ka makita ako o itong malaking supot ng pagkain na dala ko e” biro ng binata at nagtakip ng bibig ang dalaga para tumawa. “Naninibago lang ako iho kasi dati supot lang at bag hawak mo. Ngayon e…” biro ng matanda at biglang napangiti ang binata. “Ah kuya si Monique pop ala” pakilala ni Jayps.

“Oo kilala ko na yan. Lagi ko naririnig pangalan niya sa mga dumadaan dito na estudyante. Pero iho ano ba yang dala mong pagkain nanaman? Di mo naman kailangan gawin yan araw araw” sabi ng guard. “Manong talaga wala ito. Konting patikim lang. Sabi ko naman sa inyo sagot ko na araw araw almusal niyo e. Ang aga aga niyo pumasok. Kaya lang wala ako dala lagi pantulak, gamitin niyo nalang yang batuta niyo” biro ng binata at nagtawanan yung dalawa pero biglang binatukan ni Nicka si Jayps.

“Wag ganon na biro” sabi niya at agad umamo ang binata kaya lalo natawa ang guard. “Sige po manong pasok na kami” paalam ng binata. Sa locker area ng engineering building nagtungo yung dalawa, pinasok ni Jayps ang bag niya saka nagtanggal ng shirt. “O bakit ka naghuhubad?” tanong ni Nicka. “Change image” sagot ng binata at nilabas ang isang itim na shirt mula sa bag niya.

“Alam mo mas gusto ko porma mo pag may collar shirt mo” sabi ng dalaga. “Di ba napag usapan na natin ito? Kailangan ko panindigan ang aking image” paliwanag ng binata. “Hmmm oo pero sinasabi ko lang na medyo nasanay na ako sa image mo the past few days na magkasama tayo” lambing ng dalaga.

Sinuot ng binata ang shirt at inayos pa ni Nicka ito para sa kanya. “Bakit ayaw mo ba ganito porma ko?” tanong ni Jayps. Ngumiti si Monique at kinuha ang dark shades mula sa bag sabay sinuot sa binata. “How can I not like it e ako nagbigay ng mga ito sa iyo?” bigkas niya sabay pinagmasdan ang malaking smiley face na siga with shades na design sa dibdib ng binata. “Ikaw na ikaw” bulong niya at nagtawanan yung dalawa.

“Tulad ng usapan natin di tayo magpapansinan” sabi ni Jayps. “Yeah I know pero Jayps parang ang hirap gawin” sabi ni Monique. “Pero we have to, before the vacation alam nila di na tayo nagpapansinan tapos pagpasok okay na tayo at close? Parang iba iisipin nila lalo na friend mong si Rose. I cant believe tinago niya yung card” sabi ng binata. “Oh tama na wag ka na magagalit. Siguro ginawa niya yon kasi concerned sa akin. Jayps wag mo siya sasaktan, alam ko galit ka but still she is my friend” sabi ni Monique.

“Oo I wont pero Nicka masama loob ko sa kanya aaminin ko yon. I almost lost you because of her” bigkas ni Jayps at hinaplos ng dalaga ang kamay niya. “But I waited and everything turned out right diba?” lambing ni Nicka. “Oo nga e buti nalang talaga. Well at least mas magiging challenging tong gagawin natin kasi natural kontra na siya sa akin and I am sure Tim will not give up. Tapos idagdag mo pa yung battalion ng manliligaw mo” sabi ni Jayps.

“Speaking of Tim, grabe ang dami niya missed call at mga text” sabi ni Nicka. “Sinagot mo ba?” tanong ng binata. “Wala ako balak pero I am sure magkikita kami dito sa school. Are you sure na gagawin pa natin ito? Kasi alam mo aminin nalang natin para wala problema” sabi ng dalaga. “We have to, sigurado ako kumalat na ang maling balita tungkol sa akin. Alam mo ano yung totoo pero ayaw ko na ipagtanggol mo ako”

“Hayaan mo kumalat yang masamang balita na yan. I will prove them wrong. Alam ko mahihirapan tayo sa pag acting na di magkakilala pero pangako ko sa iyo I am going to win your heart” sabi ni Jayps at parang nakiliti ang dalaga at kinurot siya. “Naiintriga na talaga ako sa gagawin mo. O baka naman totorpe torpe ka ulit” sabi ni Nicka at napangisi lang ang binata.

Naglakad yung dalawa palabas ng building, nag inat si Jayps at nilanghap ang hangin. “Jayps sige na tell me anong gagawin mo?” lambing ni Nicka. “I told you watch and be amazed. O pano ba yan kailangan mo na ako dedmahin. Nicka kahit alam mo ano yung totoo please consider this a reboot or a restart. I am going to win your heart at sila lahat ang magiging witness” sabi ng binata at natatawa na talaga ang dalaga. “Hmmm sige na nga. Surprise me” sabi ni Nicka.

“Oh trust me babe, you will be” sabi ni Jayps. Isang matamis na ngiti galing kay Nicka at agad naglakad palayo ang dalaga sabay lingon at inirapan ang binata. Nakalayo konti ang dalaga, si Jayps inayos ang shades niya sabay sumigaw ng napakalakas. “HOY!!! NANDITO NA ULIT ANG SIGA!!!” sigaw niya. Natawa bigla si Monique at paglingon niya nakita niya si Jayps sa kakaibang anyo, mas siga ang asta, dalawang thumb nakapasok sa mga bulsa at cool na cool na naglalakad akala mo sa kanya ang buong paaralan.

TO BE RELEASED

2011

MALIGAYANG PAGBATI

MALIGAYANG PAGBATI

by Jonathan Paul Diaz

Kumusta ka aking mahal na kaibigan na minamahal niya?

Napakanta ka ba sa aking panimula? Malamang ikay tumatawa na

Nais ko ipaalam sa iyo na ikay aking nilimot na

OO kaya basta marinig ko pangalan mo akoy napapatalon pa

Limot na kita, burado sa aking isipan

Pero yung kamukha mong artista lagi kong pinagmamasdan

Sino ka nga ba ulet? Bakit kamukha mo wallpaper ko?

Alam ko artista ito pero sabi nila kahawig lang daw niya ito

Ako din dapat limutin mo na

Wala ako kwenta at tutulugan pa kita

Ibaon sa limot at burahin nang lubos

Pero may tanong ako, nabuo mo na ba si Optimus?

Lahat ng kulay berde aking iniiwasan

Paborito mong kulay kasi at yun ang mababaw na dahilan

Pero paglabas ko ng bahay at sa paligid mapapatingin

Kay dami daming puno, ayaw ko naman makasuhan ng illegal logging

Kaibigan wala man ako kwenta pero hindi kita sinaktan

Forever dapat yon pero ngayon di mo na malalaman

Alam mo ba akoy nanligaw at panay sampal ang inabot at sabunot sa ulo

Pagkat nung akoy nagtapat sa kanya ang sabi ko "I Monica you"

Tanda mo pa ba yung talulot kaibigan kong Ikang?

O kaya yung tula tungkol sa tunay kong kayamanan?

Lahat ng aking nilikha di lang panay salita

Galing lahat sa puso, ahem! English at tagalog pa!

E ano kung may magalit nagsasabi lang ako ng totoo

Nais lang naman kita pasayahin sa nalalapit na kaarawan mo

O siya kaibigan dito na ako magwawakas baka sumakit na ang iyong mata kababasa

Sa panghuli, sa wikang banyaga

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONICA!

Freedom of speech is the freedom to speak freely without censorship or limitation, or both

October Fourteen

October Fourteen

by Jonathan Paul Diaz

I am not superstitious and i dont believe in fate

But there is something special about this certain date

Two years ago exactly on October Fourteen

I wrote a story entitled, "A Walk with Caileen"

For seven days i was engulfed making this story

Writing from the heart, basically it was about me

The story was more of a dream but not lacking emotion

It reflected my current state, I was ready to move on

Caileen was a girl and she was only seventeen

Unconsciously in the story her birthday was October Fourteen

Pretty, intelligent, kind hearted, talkative and sweet

Who would have thought i character i created i would meet

Exactly six months after finishing the story

The real life Caileen suddenly texted me

At first it was not clear but something was about to unfold

A different love story that has never been told

I fell in love with the real Caileen

Whose birthday does really fall on October Fourteen

Was it premonition? How did she become real?

Or was it my heart calling out to the other heart that it could feel?

Beyond human capacity i loved her dearly

On her birthday last year i wrote her a story

"Half of Me" because that is what she is to me

The reason i smile, and the only one who brings out

the awesome in me

Wake up amateur writer, life is not a fantasy

You can never have the ending written in your story

Caileen is indeed real but someone owns her heart

The fairy tale you so desired failed from the start

Yes i am awake and bleeding from within

Living lifelessly because i can never be with Caileen

And so it was premotion but a sugar coated fantasy

Happy what is written, but in real life a tragedy

October Fourteen will always be special to me

Never forgotten, never erased, etched in my heart's memory

I wish you a happy day and please wear that majestic smile that i have seen

You will never be mine but you will always be my Caileen

October Fourteen...

...i will never be one of your roses but remember I will always be that different flower

...I will never get to dance with you with that soft love song

...but in my imagination we shall never stop dancing...to the song our hearts used to sing together...

...on your special day...

...even for a few seconds

...even if we are apart

...dance with me

...the real P.A. Kevins will always be in love with the real Caileen

HOUSE OF JEFF

Show encrypted text

Dont whine and dont be irate. This is a group comm work.

Nine Two Five

Nine Two Five

by Jonathan Paul Diaz

My friend will say yes to her suitor today, that is how it started

There is no difference i commented and so we debated

Both not wanting to lose we fought tooth and nail

And then you attached two words and i couldnt even exhale

Beyond a friend that is how you accepted me

Not just me, not even you, now its we

I was happy where i was but you took me higher

A tremendous state of bliss, hoping that it would last forever

And the following day our love was immediately tested

A typhoon named Ondoy had your place severely devastated

I was so far away, i felt your fear and hated this day

I prayed so hard for God not to end our love this way

And the sun shone brightly, he did hear my prayer

With one test down, he gave us another

Ten straight days the rain poured so badly

I never felt it because you made me feel you were beside me

A few months later our love slowly faded

But you went out of your way to have it reignited

Three wonderful days, it was finally just you and me

Every second we were together is clearly recorded in my memory

Its nine two five again and i know i should be greeting you

Something that starts with happy and ends with i love you

The last three words are still true but the greeting lost its way

Its nine two five again, today was supposed to be a happy day

...it was supposed to be a happy day

...still, i love you

Behind that Wall

Behind that Wall

by Jonathan Paul Diaz

Two worlds separated by a concrete barrier

Two people being drawn by the wall to come closer

Seated by the wall they start communicating

A brief exchange and a new friendship was beginning

As days passed the wall didnt matter

The two found a way to virtually be together

Even in their situation their feelings grew deeper

They have found love even if they were not together

With a chisel and hammer they both started chipping

After a few months face to face they were smiling

Finally holding hands and relaxing on warm embraces

Lips finally locked, under the wall two inseperable faces

But their moments of bliss didnt last long

The girl was pulled back to where she belongs

Again separated with the wall now fortified

In a span of a few days all their dreams have died

In tears and sorrow did they both linger

Back in their own worlds, now far from each other

In a few months the girl again started living

As in the other world the man was still waiting

In times of sadness and so much despair

Stare at the wall for there is always someone there

When your world brings you sorrow and in your knees you fall

Always remember there is a man who loves you behind that wall

Dont waste your time making wishes on each passing shooting star. Hold my hand tight and say your wish aloud. With all my might i will do my best to make your wish come true. I may fail but at least you will see me trying compared to the shooting star that you will never see again. - Paul Diaz

Rediscovery

Rediscovery

(Humming)

Hey why are you hiding here?

- oh its you, its too hot inside

You have been here for two hours now and the sun is already setting

- yeah, i like to watch the sunset

But the sun is on the other side, you cant see it from here

- Yes i know

So why are you here?

- (sighs) i want to be alone

(Smirks) You missed this place dont you?

- yeah, this used to be my play ground

They sure missed you, they are all happy to see you again

- I can see that

The problem is they dont know that you have changed

- No i didnt!

Yes you did, and you know you did

- I am still me

Are you still you?

- (sighs) ....

They know the old you, are you still the same person?

- ....

You pretend you are the old you

- i know, i can still be the old me

I know that, i can see you trying but you are elusive to their

questioning.

- They dont have to know

Are you sure? These people accept you. You cheer them up.

I am sure they would like to know

- No they dont

Hmmmm... so what are you going to do if they keep asking questions?

Eventually you will have to answer them

- I can manage to change the topic...i can make them laugh instead

And you think they will not notice? These people care for you. They really missed you.

The moment you arrived they have been playing tug of war and you are the rope

- (smiles)

Oh is that a smile that i see? Thats rare

- yeah it strains my face muscles when i do that

There was a time when you were all smiles, what happened to you?

- do you really need to ask? you should know

I do, i just wanted to hear it from you

- ......

Cold treatment again. You are thinking of her again am i right?

- ...yeah

Why do you keep on punishing yourself? You are home, you should be happy

- ......

(Sighs) Happiness is a choice, you know that because she taught you that

- Thinking of her makes me happy

And sad at the same time

- yeah

Let her go

- i cant

Happiness is a choice, you are happy here i can tell

- I am. I would be happier with her

But you know that will never happen

- yes i know

Suffering is an option

- you dont have to remind me

You really are still in love with her are you?

- call me stupid but yes i am

You can never move on if you are that way

- maybe i dont want to move on

(laughs) And suffer for the rest of your life?

- No one will never know, i am a good pretender

You really are stupid, the people here know you are going through a rough patch.

Didnt you notice they are trying to cheer you up

- So they know?

Not really but they can sense that you are not yourself

- maybe i should pretend harder

Maybe you should move on

- .....

You and her...never gonna happen. You know that

- I know. But there is only one her, if there were many like her then i could have easily

move on

That is why each one is unique. There is only one her and only one you. The sad part is that

the one she wants to be with isnt you

- .......

Let her go

- i dont want to

Stupid!

- and what does that make you then?

Stupid too i guess (both laughing)

- I am still in love with her

I know but you have to let her go

- I wont

Let me repeat, you well know that you and her will never happen

- Yes but that doesnt mean i cant continue loving her

Oooh one sided love

- who ever said that love should be both ways? I still love her. Nothing has changed

Really? She isnt talking to you anymore

- So what? I still love her

Geez, you are really stubborn. Close the door on her already

- Sure, i can do that but i will always leave one window open

You really are amazing, do you want a rope and hang yourself?

- Sure, as long as you go first. I promise to follow (Both laugh)

(Sigh) So you are still madly in love with her

- (smiles) hell yeah

What makes her so special?

- (smiles wider) ...

Geez that smile says a lot, she is the only that can make you smile like that

- ....

So okay, you still love her. But you know that you and her will never happen right?

- Crystal clear

And you are okay with that?

- Perfectly

But you still have to move on with your life

- I surely will

Now i am confused, how in hell are you going to move on?

- So easy, live my life and continue loving her. Its not that hard

I really want to punch you in the face right now

- Hahahaha go ahead you will only be hurting yourself

Yeah i know, it would be stupid punching myself hahahaha

- Why do you keep asking me questions when you know the answers already?

Because you are one side of the coin and i am the other but still we are one coin

- I used to think that she was the other side

Stupid, i am here to keep you sane. If i leave you alone you have gone nuts already.

You should thank me for i maintain the balance in us. I actually am the old you. You better let me back in to make us complete. Call it a rediscovery.

- hahahaha and if i do you still you wont be able persuade me

Because you are madly in love with her. How can you beat the power of love?

- i know so you should stop trying

Dont worry i wont interfere anymore

- Oh and why is that?

Because i am also in love with her. Geez i am you and you are me

- (Laughs) We better go back inside before they think i am crazy

Oh dont worry talking to yourself is normal, but you are supposed to do it mentally

and not talk aloud like us (both laugh)

- Dont worry they dont know you exist, so i will take the blame

Oh so now i dont exist? I do exist and you are the imaginary one (laughs)

- (humming)

(sings)

Cos if one day you wake up

And find that you're missin' me

And your heart start to wonder

Where on this earth i could be

Thinkin' maybe you come back

To the place that we meet

And you'd see me waitin' for you

At the corner of the street

I'm not movin'

I'm not movin'

I'm not movin'

I'm not movin'

- Wow you know that song too?

Stupid! You have been singing it for a week now

- and of course you are me (both laugh)

Cos if one day you wake up

And find that you're missin' me

And your heart start to wonder

Where on this earth i could be

Thinkin' maybe you come back

To the place that we meet

And you'd see me waitin' for you

At the corner of the street

I'm not movin'

I'm not movin'

I'm not movin'

I'm not movin'

What if you find someone new along the way?

- Stop asking questions that you already know the answer to...

Never A Memory

Never A Memory

by Paul Diaz

Two strangers we began, living separate worlds apart

A single text message sent and the pen of fate had to start

Our story began with a plot that was still unknown

Our worlds moved closer to each other, attracted to

the true colors that we have shown

Days have passed and barriers were torn down as our worlds became just one

Our story now had direction, our love story had just began

The smile i lost not so long ago you did return to my face

And so my heart began to beat again, my arms now longing for your embrace

Heroes are usually us men, with awe we sweep women of their feet

From the depths of depression my hero is you, armed with a love that

is true and sweet

The missing pieces of the broken me you filled with pieces of your own

There was no me, there was no you, it was now we as our love had grown

I was able to dream again, asleep or awake it was always the same

My once lifeless heart now was full of joy and keeps shouting your name

I once secluded myself, to hide from pain my heart i covered in stone

Now my heart is free, Its you i want, only you i want to be with,

you and you alone

A few more chapters and months that passed we finally met

You gave me the best birthday gift that i could ever get

To hold your hand, wrap you around my arms and see your smile

This are all the reasons that would make living worthwhile

Our story took a turn for the worst and fate ended it abruptly

What i thought was to be an epic novel became just a short story

This was something i was forced to accept, something i never wanted

What was recently a joyous heart was now beating so slowly, so lifeless

and seeming dead

I take out my phone and see a thousand messages, the memories bury me deeper

I close my eyes and then i do remember, our first kiss, our first embrace, and

the tons of laughter

Tears would do me no good, pleading wont even bring you back to me

I am in pain, i want you as you and never as a memory

It will take some time for me to move on and for this fool to accept

I am undergoing a very hard time for my stubborn heart is on write-protect

But all of this will pass because i already knew from the very start

The moment i said i love you, was the same time i broke my own heart

...still hoping that you will never be a memory

Earth Angel

Earth Angel

by Paul Diaz

Heaven sent a being, as a human you were to be

Your true form remains hidden, i pity those who could not see

Overflowing kindness and a heart that is true

Walking among us mortals an angel that is you

Intelligent and well mannered you were raised to be

But a much more fitting adjective would be extraordinary

As you spread your wings to a confined space they let you fly

Hidden within your smile, is the hope to reach the sky

Then one day with courage to the clouds you flew

You obtained true happiness a feeling that you never knew

Even for a short stint you knew this is where you had to be

High above the clouds so happy and free

To the land you return with true happiness in tow

Everything did change and your escapade they did know

They say you did wrong and you defend with your might

They never did listen, since when were you right?

What they want is important and not what you really feel

Both hands in shackle and the loss of free will

They threaten to cut your wings and to take the sky away

What you want will always be wrong, all you can do is obey

Grounded angel save your wings and do surrender

You shall be free one day and the sky is there forever

Earthly angel please do wipe the tears on your face

The pain you feel now will be erased one day by the sky's warmly embrace

I hope you never forget and always keep remembering

That same happy feeling that tomorrow may once again bring

For now you are sad but soon your smile they would see

A smile not of happiness, but a mark of your enslavery

...the sky bleeds...

...and yet it waits...